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December 4, 2017

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Fearless Self-Love Podcast

December 4, 2017

My path of self-inquiry -- of discovering that surrender is my religion & that practicing fearless self-love is the most selfless thing I can do-- led me to the mountains. 

 

The mountains have been calling to me for years. Arriving here and staying here, are ways I have followed through in showing up for myself. I made sure to record the reminder that I can show up for myself with a tattoo of the Swan Range of the Rockies on my right forearm.

 

The podcast is much like the mountains for me. 

 

Majestic, strong and grounded, the mountains humble me.

 

I recall walking down the hill on the northside of Ann Arbor, near Sic Transit Cycles, thinking something I found to be very helpful at the time. That time was 4 years ago or more. Currently, I don't recall what that thought was. But my next one was, what if I could have a podcast, "Walks with Andrea?!" It wasn't a passing thought, though I did not pursue it either. I didn't walk to work everyday, and the concept of recording my morning musings waned with my consistency of transportation. 

 

Fast forward a year or so to a post I wrote on my facebook page about wondering what it would take for me to see myself as gorgeous.

 

Then to the moment in my Ayurvedic Health Counselor training when I got so angry I wanted to leave, but did not know why. What came of that was the first time I told myself I love myself, a spoken word poem, and a tatoo on my left wrist. 

 

Next to the bitchy spiritual memoir I began when my ex-husband left for the first time and I wrote 20,000 words in a month about love, loss, dreams and God. 

 

When I moved to the mountains, I had a vision of ease. I roamed unknown roads on Summer evenings with my dog in tow. We'd swim in water we wouldn't have seen without decidedly getting lost. I worked 6 days each week to ensure I could develop my Yoga Health Coaching program, @ home in your body. I stayed quiet and anonymous for a while. When I was ready to emerge, connect and build real community on the ground in northwest Montana, my vision for a podcast came alive again. I began interviewing friends I admired who had something interesting and different to offer. I called the show the Grounded Here Yogi Podcast and continued to play small by hiding it on my website, never to be discovered by anyone who didn't already read everything I wrote. 

 

In the past 18 months, since moving to Montana, a lot has changed for me. Change is inevitable, and always involves shedding skin that no longer fits. 

 

The skin I wore for years that kept me unknown, unnoticed, working a zillion side jobs, tired, broke, hustling like a hamster in a cage that can't see beyond the glass, that skin is shedding. 

 

It feels a little like ripping the wax and cloth off newly hair-free legs. That is to say, it doesn't feel great. But the outcome, is silky smooth and I love it!  Sure, I am still plucking out the hairs left behind--those pesky tasks & obligations I once loved and that served me, but no longer help me move toward the most important thing in my business: nurturing the @ home in your body community & supporting thriving, flourishing lives through healthy habit change. The podcast is a huge part of nurturing the growth of this community. 

 

And through this shedding, stripping down to just what matters most, I am beginning to see the possibility of living my own dream life, having an ideal schedule, making enough money to have a home, family, travel, and rest with true ease. 

 

Making the Podcast the most important way I can show up for myself, and for you, in my work is part of that dream becoming a reality.

 

Interviewing people I admire, recording a song I co-wrote with my friend Jamie Wyman, and sharing my insights on fearless self-love with the world also feels as bold as a mountain is strong. The nerves I feel as I listen to the recordings, add in sound bites, adjust volume and cue up the Courageous Self-Love song leave me buzzing and yet very clear that I am human.